Yes, it's true. I was liberated from heart break by a flirty little black dress. How can that be, you ask? Well, I'm glad you did.
On a shopping whim with a roommate last year, I splurged on a completely irresponsible and unecessary, yet totally adorable-translation must have-dress. And being that I had no occassion to where this little number-keeping with the "unecessary"theme-it sat in my closet for much of that year. Occassionally, I'd take it out, try it on, admire myself in it (embarrassingly admitted), and hang it back up.
You see, I decided this dress should be saved for a date with Mr. Heart, aka longtime crush, on whom I hoped my charms, nudges, hints, and all out pursuit of would win. Yet, as the days passed as usual and the phone sat silently misplaced, the Cinderella inside protested, "Where, oh where is the ball? When will Prince Charming come? And more importantly, will I ever be invited?" Not only did I want to be rescued from the drudgery of everyday life; I was hoping for the beauty inside of me to be revealed and cherished by the man I loved. The dress was the means to feeling that beauty, but it meant nothing without Mr. Heart's appreciation. "All dressed up and nowhere to go," is the old cliche that, oddly enough, rings true here.
So...it's not like the fairytales. My life did in fact go on. I did what I suppose anyone else would do. Packed up, moved on-literally-but I kept that dress. I even wrote a poem about it. I navigated my way through the stages of grief:denial (it might still happen), sadness (it's never gonna happen with this guy), anger (why didn't he like me?!), and acceptance (hey, it's not gonna happen and I'm ok). Although, I sometimes waiver between denial and what I like to call hope: It might by some remote chance still happen, but I'm gonna live my life.
And in keeping with that theme, a girlfriend called me the other night and invited me to go swing dancing. I went to my closet, went straight for that little black dress, and was the belle of my own ball. It felt great! Maybe it wasn't such a frivilous purchase after all.
5 comments:
Nice piece! You are true to yourself and rather eloquent. Like you said, "unintentionally funny". Nice! My not responding to your request for communication on "you know what" was not a sleight. I am not a subscriber and never had a reason to. You do give me a reason though. However, I do not know if you want me to though. In anycase be sweet, keep posting and God bless.
Oh, I was wondering if you were that Peter. Hmm...ok
Well now you know. What do you want to do now?
Well...thanks, but no thanks
Has it really been that long since we went swing dancing? I guess I've kinda lost the drive... and I've got other things going now... I don't know... I don't feel really motivated to do that lately. You? I like to dress up for swing dancing too, but sometimes I feel a little overdressed, you know? I'm not one that likes to blatantly stand out in a crowd :)
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