I keep looking for someone to tell me the way to go...Sometimes the best students make for the most ill prepared in life. I excelled in controlled environments where I new what was expected. "Read these pages. Spell these words. Add these numbers." My cohorts grimaced in frustration and annoyance at these words, but I would laugh inside and visibly smirk. Of course, I tried to appear humble. But I and everyone else knew I loved school and was one of the best at it. School was a joy for me. And it was only the beginning. I looked forward to a successful life and career, which would be determined well before College.
Now as I look at my resume in the midst of yet another job search, I am tired frustrated, and disappointed. The resume reflects a person looking for her way in the world. Nursing, massage, nursing, server...It just goes on and on. And I haven't included all of my jobs. That would consume ten pages! I can't even remember all of them. Jobs as meaningless as they are plentiful. Many of the jobs I've seen require experience. I realize that's something I have not been building all these years of job hopping. I've disqualified myself. Instead of slowly building a career, I've crashed and burned several. Where am I? Who am I?
Still I have hope. Hope is not determined by fact, but a deep inner force. I don't consider my circumstances. I only say to myself, "I will fulfill my potential, somehow. There is a God. There must be a way." Didn't Thomas Edison fail hundreds of times before inventing the light bulb? This may be my hundreth time, but I'm getting up once again...It can only get better!
No one else is going to stand up for me-or make my choices for me. This is life-My life-and as such, I must live it.
